If there has ever been anything beautiful, it was you.

Still, I always knew, even if you were real,

And not just a lesion in some cancerous mind, maybe mine,

I would never be able to reach you.

I would never be able to touch you.

I would never be able to have you.

After all, through the years,

And there have been so many years,

Your mind has grown more solid, present, powerful,

But your heart has faded away from my grasp -

No, your heart never faded.

It's as strong as ever, so much stronger than mine,

But it's imprisoned now,

And you know you devised your own bonds.

It's just that I know what futility does.

I know all too well what it's like

To lose conviction and yet never faith,

To have no guide and yet to see the path beneath your feet,

What it's like to slowly realize you will never find your home,

Without ever managing to quite believe it.

So then eventually you end up knowing

That nothing you ever did, at any time in your life,

Was ever getting you one step closer to anywhere -

Knowing, yes, but never realizing.

By then it's too late, and there's no other path to take.

You've become anchored to your road.

Since you've done so much already, you cannot give up hope,

But you no longer have any goals to hope for.

So.

I know, I know - you've thrown your life away.

I've thrown mine away, too, too many times to count.

It's funny how we both go on living.

It would be funny, if it didn't hurt.

But what's even funnier -

I just know you'll laugh -

Realize: I was searching for you all along,

Not to reach you, or to touch you, or to have you -

Maybe just to see you.

I wanted to see you.

Somehow, though, I ended up becoming you.

Listen to me talk, and you'll hear that I've become you.

Well, I guess I've reached you.

I suppose I can touch you.

I might even have you.

But I don't think that was ever what I meant.
 

Author's Note: This is more complicated than it may look on the surface. No matter how you want to take it, though, this one's definitely about Krelian. One way or another.